Sunday, May 6, 2012

Stress

I have a lot of wedding things to chat about this week but I wanted to stop and make a post about the other side of life. I've noticed that in the past few weeks I have become very forgetful, which is very uncharacteristic of me, and honestly it's kind of frightening sometimes but I'm sticking in there currently! Who knows how frazzled I'll be in a couple months.. whew. 

It's made me also realize, that in my free time I'm constantly looking up wedding inspiration and details, etc. I spend countless hours on the web while fiance sits next to me on his computer or watching tv. For instance, since I got up this morning I have been looking at wedding stuff and it's currently 11:45. YIKES. Sometimes I just need to throw on the breaks, and I'm realizing that a lot with my relationship with fiance. 

Things aren't bad between us, but I'm so busy I feel like I'm neglecting us as a couple. Less kisses, less communicating, less attention and it's making me a wee bit sad! In two weeks we are headed to the beach for a weekend and we kept thinking of whether monetarily it's a good idea, but we got a good deal and we decided we NEEDED to go. We NEED to go because we NEED to get away and just be US. No computers, limited cell us, just us two bonding over each other like we are accustom to.


us vacationing last May on Bald Head Island

So while I was in the process of wedding hunting, I checked my blogs and have been looking at my friend Lauren's friend's blog, (You following that?!), and saw her post about her and her hubby who are in a young married couples class and how they were discussing romance. Even though we're not married yet, we live together so we're pretty much in a similar boat. Here's what her post suggested to spice up your love life:
  
  1. Connect with something he feels successful in/enjoys. Does he have a hobby that you aren't particularly interested in? Take an interest in it with him. Get decked out for a game and watch it with him. Go for a motorcycle ride with him or join him at a Harley show {biker chick hair and all ;)}. Guys like to do things they are good at. Build him up by commenting on how great he is at x,y,z. Oh, and sex. He most always likes that :) 
  2. 'Romance is knowing your lover" Become a student to your man. Learn what he likes, doesn't like. Each person is different and requires different ways of being romanced. Romance takes effort and practice. Don't give up after one big flop.
  3. Make it a point to think of your man romantically during the day. Sneak in the closet and smell one of his sweaters. Keep a photo of him at your office or on your phone. Randomly call him to say 'i love you' during the day. Think of a special intimate time together after the hustle and bustle of the day but before you get home so you are out of work mode and in wife mode.
  4. Have each of you make a list of dream dates and cheap dates. Hang both lists up somewhere where you both can be reminded of it. This will be awesome to pull from when you want to surprise him with something that truly makes him happy.
  5. Create anticipation. Send him a risque text during the day about what will happen that night. Ooo la la! Send him cards in the mail each day leading up to a big vacation or anniversary. Buy new lingerie but have him open it at a point during the day when you aren't around.
  6. Set the mood. Candles make the world of a difference {and they make you feel sexy}. Spritz on a new scent or one that he loves. Slip into something sexy. 
  7. INVEST in your relationship and the romance. Set aside some money in your budget each month for romantic things - whether it's new lingerie, a trip to a local bed and breakfast for one night, a big special trip, special surprises, candles, etc. Make sure that you are making your relationship a priority... including financially.   
I appreciated what she had to contribute and it makes me want to make a little more effort between now and the wedding so that we BOTH are still appreciating each other when we get lost in the details of party planning instead of the LOVE that we are celebrating!! 


So I'm going to make some effort today to make sure I'm paying attention to fiance and I'm going to shut off this computer and tell him how great he really is!


 xoxo,
a.

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